My Halloween

It was a dark and fearful night,
Many were out just for a fright!
Odd all of this seems to me,
Why can't we just all be happy??

I don't understand the point,
Let me see you do THIS with your joint!
Yes, talented I'm fully aware,
So please, let me be spared!

Dressing up, going door-to-door,
Mostly for free candy, nothing more.
What a complete waste of time,
It's for the night, no sunshine.

Here, allow me to put it like this,
Everything about this, is amiss.
Some people on this day are mean,
Yet we "celebrate" this, Halloween.

(written October 31st, 2009)

Oh Sir, Oh Dear

Oh Mr.Todd, sir,
I can't believe it's been so long,
I had wondered where you'd gone.
I'm sorry about your dear Lucy.

Oh Mr. Todd, sir,
Don't let it eat away at you,
Revenge will be claimed soon.
Soon enough he will be yours.

Oh Mr.Todd, sir,
Think the decision right through,
Don't let him be the first you'd slew.
Get yourself a reputation first.

Oh Mr.Judge, sir,
Why don't you come on by?
Have a shave or even a pie.
I'm sure you'll love them both.

Oh Mr. Judge, sir,
Why are you so harsh and crude,
Some say you're more then rude.
All can see the incest in your eyes.

Oh Mr.Judge, sir,
I'm almost sorry that you're blind,
You can't even save what you find.
Your time is coming to a bitter end.

Oh goodness, dear,
This new trade of ours is doing well,
And for the wonders I'll end up in hell.
But it will be well worth it!

Oh goondess, dear,
I wonder if I should ever say,
That his Lucy's only gone away.
I know she never died!

Oh goodness, dear,
I almost can't believe it's come to this,
All these lies for such wonderful bliss.
This is the best for me, ever!

Oh Mr.Todd, sir,
Something's gone terribly wrong,
I'm afraid we've led dear Toby on.
We're about to be discovered!

Oh Mr.Judge, sir,
Welcome to our humble little shops,
Mine's down here, Todd's the tops.
Please go and have a visit!

Oh goodness, dear,
I think that this might be the end,
In Mr.Todd I've found a friend.
Oh no, not the boiler!!

(written October 31st, 2009)

Silent Life Lessons

You taught me everything I know,
In an unconventional way of course.
More out of silence and company,
Or out of random object selection.

When I needed to be pulled up,
You handed me a giant hook.
When I needed confrontation,
You suggested food for thought.

When I was troubled by worries,
You stared me down and glared.
When I was on the very edge,
You taunted me with a push.

Testing my nerves in every way,
You actually made me grateful.
Grateful for what I had and have,
Grateful for people in my life, like you.



(written October 13th, 2009)

Barber Bliss

Condemned and forsaken,
Though no crime was committed.
Forced to leave the city,
For all the days of his life.

Though fate should have it,
He was saved by a young lad.
Sailed back to his hometown,
Where he decided, to start over.

He used an old profession of his,
To his greatest advantage.
Benjamin Barker was his name,
Though, now, he went by another.

A deep grudge he held onto,
A burning fire of revenge raged within.
Aimed towards a particular judge,
Who was holding his daughter captive.

A barber was his greatest passion,
Made up his mind to put it to use.
Finally getting his reimbursement,
Mrs. Lovett's meat pies were perfect.

A cover-up though it was,
It saved her dwindling shop.
She saved her job by serving a new recipe,
Known as preacher, homeless, unwanted.

Anyone was fair game to his anger,
She was willing to go along side of him.
She was in it for the company and love,
His purpose was much more diverse.

The judge had finally stepped into the shop,
Sat down in the chair and prepared himself.
A close shave was all that he wanted,
And a bit of a scented skin massage.

He had lost him once before,
He wasn't about to let it happen again.
Holding the knife to the judge's throat,
He announced his true identity.

For so long now he had hidden,
Hidden behind the mask of another name.
Helping Mrs. Lovett's success,
She helped his repuation...using his alias...
Sweeney Todd.


(written October 13th, 2009)

We Are All Princesses

I may be young on the outside,
But I know who and what I am.
You may be old to the naked eye,
But I'm sure you're aware too.

Even if you have moles and warts,
Or scars, bruises and cuts all over.
If you're lucky to have perfect skin,
Flawless and silky smooth to the touch.

Whether you can't afford anything,
Or you can afford to buy the world.
If you come from a large family,
Or your family is small and humble.

It doesn't matter if you sit on a throne,
Or if your residence is in the country.
All girls are Princesses. The young,
The old, the beautiful, the disfigured.

We are all worthy to be Princesses,
Whether we believe ourselves to be;
Someone in our lives has always, I'm sure,
Called us their little Princess. Someone.

(written August 12th, 2009)

Illumination

Light,
Shines bright,
Illuminating everything,
In its way. Walls, corridors,
Stairs, pictures, doors, all things
That require a light to see
Them clearly. But once
The light goes out,
All you could see,
Is left to the
Dim of
Dark.

(written August 12th, 2009)

The Victim of Loss

Strewn around the room, is debris,
Obvious, among it, dust and cobwebs.
The walls are painted in splatters of red,
Splatters that cover the white base.

The smell fills your nostrils as you enter,
That of decay, rot, along with mold.
The wooden bed frame stained as well,
The mirror rusting and smashed.

The desk drawers opened, dug through,
Nothing in the room is in it's place.
The colour in the room is particularly dull,
The light in the room incredibly dim.

Flicking on the switch, the artificial bulb,
Creates a deceiving aura throughout the room.
Spotted right there on the bed,
The evidence that produces a mystery.

Questions that come to mind are,
What happened? Why this person?
Does the family know? How do we tell them?
A blow to the head, a blast in the gut.

Nearly decapitated, the head hangs,
Bruising at the wrists and ankles.
There are signs of struggling and suffering,
In the end, the victim lost...their life.

It is officially your job, to figure out details,
Who did it, why it happened, everything.
Snap, sketch, bag, tag, collect the proof,
Remember that all you see is liability.

Once all the evidence is collected,
Probed and tested for all theories.
You'll be free to move forward and rest,
After you put all the pieces together.

(written July 17th, 2009)

In My World

Have you ever wondered,
What it would be like;
If you were in a romantic story?
Or, if you were an enchantress?

Being able to cast spells,
Through magic arrows.
Have undying love that,
Helped restore your love's life.

Or what if you were a damsel,
Locked in the highest tower;
Just waiting to be rescued,
By your very own Prince Charming.

Have you ever wondered about,
Anything that was out of ordinary?
I have. I live in a world all my own,
A world of make belief. It's wonderful.

A glorious place, where demons and
Angels battle, Princes and Princesses,
Struggle to be able to share their love.
It's a romantic place full of adventure.

I would love to share it with you,
There's only one catch to getting there.
You have to believe. In magic.
Once you do, my world will unfold as yours.

(written August 12th, 2009)

I Cannot Wait

I've come to learn that things aren't simple,
Life can be so hard sometimes, so unfair.
I never would have imagined two worlds,
So different from one another, coinciding.

I find though that my past still comes,
It haunts me through dreams and memories.
It shares the space of current events unfolding,
Creating a frightening connection to the past.

So far, I've seen a man's life be taken from him,
I've seen a boy's father mourn over his son;
I've lost a great mentor, even my God-Father,
In addition to my parents...I am very frightened.

However, I know what I must do, and be brave,
I must conquer and defeat the great Dark Lord.
I know what it is I'm looking for, horcruxes,
Which will kill off the remaining parts of his soul.

Once that is done, there will be no more fear,
The world will be able to rest at ease, breathe.
I may not get back all those lost to me, but,
I will not lose anymore of those close to me.

(written August 12th, 2009)

Elegant Beauty

You have a coat of silk,
A white patch on your brow;
In the shape of a heart,
Broad shouldered, strong.

Young and full of spirit,
You always remain faithful.
Expected to adapt to change,
Never knowing what will come.

You've made life long friends,
And lost all those dear to you.
Trials, suffering, heartache,
You've experienced them all.

Though you're still young,
You still have much knowledge.
You've made it through, and,
You've survived, coming home.

Once separated from a dear friend,
Now, reunited once again with him.
You're home, you're free, and now,
There is no more pain for you.

The life that has caused your coat,
To dull, your eyes become lifeless,
Your frame to become all bones;
Now dwindles into not but a memory.

Resting in a pasture of greenery,
Your life is restored to it's original beauty.
Silky black coat, bright white patch,
Eyes full of life...once again you are elegant.

(written August 12th, 2009)

Dance Performance

Turn your music way up,
Dance around and jump.
Sing it out loud and proud,
Keep your feet, don't fall down.

There are nobody's eyes,
For which there are no spies.
Redeem all your light heartedness,
Believe yourself to be a goddess.

Now nothing can stop you,
It's who you are, that's true.
You are light on your feet,
That's how you conquer defeat.

You cannot be touched there,
When you fly through the air.
Without the intense pull of gravity,
You're free to experience amity.

Generous, free, flexible, light you are,
Your freedom leaves you with no scar.
Draw upon all the energy within,
Close your eyes as you let go and spin.

As the song continues to play,
Your hands in the air, they sway.
Then the song comes to an end,
You crouch down with a bend.

For now, the dance is over and done,
Again you will dance, with the rise of the sun.
Every songs begins a new dance,
Every day brings a new chance.

(written July 17th, 2009)

Things On My Mind

As I sit here, watching the time go by,
I wonder why I have these feelings.
Numerous thoughts racing in my mind,
Showing and telling me horrendous things.

Remembering memories that never happened,
Seeing all sorts of things that never occurred.
Many of the memories are quite realistic,
A lot of them honestly real, the rest are not.

Holding me back in an emotional state of being,
A state of confusion, irrationality and horrification.
Sights, sounds, smells all equally present and absent,
Continuously running through all my senses.

At one point I thought that I had found people,
That I could learn to trust, love, hope to help me.
I have been shown the truth though, was a fallacy,
Deceit, shadows hidden behind bright masks.

I always wonder if there will ever be anyone,
That I can trust, believe, hope without fail;
Who will never leave me or abandon me,
Someone who will ensure I feel fairly safe.

However, I have been shown the truth,
Once again, that there is no such thing.
Safety is not in numbers, cannot be found,
In other people who portray as friends.

A very sad truth that keeps me up,
Throughout the night, through the day;
It keeps me thinking, continuously wishing,
And hoping that it could still happen.

(written July 17th, 2009)

Liability Of A Comment

Never be told it's possible,
Never open yourself up.
Hide inside your stone walls,
The only place where you're safe.

Eventually the shock will wear,
In time it won't be so morbid.
Just when you think it's okay,
The table gets turned on you.

Stabbed in your very heart,
Because of your own history.
Joked about, used for amusement,
Something that is serious.

In your walls you'll be alright,
You can't be hurt that way.
You cannot be reached,
Your heart cannot be broken.

(written July 17th, 2009)

Shine Your Shoes

In the closet lay a pair of black shoes,
A single strap, rounded toe, platform heel.
They sit there collecting a thick layer of dust,
Stripping the shine away from them.

You wore them once before, for a date,
It's been a while since you've needed them.
There are so many other pairs, of which,
You've passed on, given away, or still wear.

However, this pair remains in your closet,
Reminding you of a very special night.
A night that would be the happy of forever,
Where all the lights would seem like stars.

You kept them there, for good measure,
Just in case you needed them ever again.
They became your good luck charms,
Never failing in your preconceived wish.

From the first day of forever, you wore them,
With you through all the years, they remain.
Now is the time though, to take them out,
Bring back their life, just for the heck of it.

Revive the past, for the good sake it was,
Allow the shoes to show their potential.
Let them join you on another adventure,
Clean them up, wipe the dust from them.

Just because you haven't used them since,
Doesn't mean you can't use them now.
Open the closet, reach down for the pair,
After you dust and clean, shine your shoes.

(written July 17th, 2009)

The First Date

Dress in your jade greens,
Wear your hair down and curled.
Allow your eyes to shine bright,
Make sure your smile is wide.

Brush on your cheeks light blush,
Apply a strawberry flavoured gloss.
Spritz a small light floral fragrance,
Enhance your eyes with shadow.

Before you head downstairs,
Double check your prep lists.
Your emerald diamond earrings,
And emerald necklace, check.

Stunning as you'll ever be,
Especially for this very night.
As you sit there patiently,
You can feel the butterflies.

Fluttering though your mind,
All the worst case scenarios.
Through your stomach and blood,
Twitters all the nerves in you.

As you're deep in thought,
Your doorbell rings out.
You gain your composure,
Answering the door with a smile.

You're now on your way,
To enjoy an evening with someone.
Who's special, attractive and
Very interesting. Now have fun.

(written July 17th, 2009)

An Invisible Threat

The most dangerous weapon,
Ever known to human kind.
More subtle then a firearm,
Or even a butcher's knife.

It's edge is sharper then a sword,
It pierces faster then an arrow.
It burns you worst then flame,
It can be colder then frostbite.

Yet, it's the fastest healer,
It recovers quicker then anything.
Everything it does is recorded,
There is no deleting it's effects.

Be aware of how you wield it,
Be conscious of its available tasks.
As it too can drag you through,
The mud, the rain and the storm.

(written July 17th, 2009)

Lay Me To Rest

Snap you pictures,
Draw your sketches.
I'll lay here motionless,
Listening and watching.

I may not be breathing,
I may not be alive,
But I'm close enough
To be waiting patiently.

Your coroner will dissect me,
Your forensic scientist...
They will test everything in me,
The evidence will report the truth.

Once it is all revealed,
Once there is closure.
Your pictures and sketches
Will mean achievement.

You'll be able to carry on,
They'll be able to move on.
I'll be able to be at peace,
Everything will lay to rest.

(written July 14th, 2009)

Visit and Dash

Away in LA is where she stayed.
She went there for 3 months.
Then travelled overseas, to Africa.
She went there for 3 months.

Home she came to see her friends.
Her family missed her so much.
She's still out of the house.
Her family misses her so much.

She will be going back to LA.
She will have hardly stayed.
She'll leave before her birthday.
She will have hardly stayed.


(written August 27th, 2007)

The Clouds

Big and fluffy,
White and pure.
Images afloat,
All perception.

Big and thick,
Grey and scary.
Looming above,
Filling with dread.

Big and full,
White and soft.
Illuminating stars,
Reflecting lights.

Invisible and gone,
Transparent, clear.
Everything visible,
Refreshingly crisp.


(written November 6th, 2007)

We Live In A Time, Where

We live in a time,
Where war once was,
Where war now is,
Where war will be.

We live in a time,
Where peace never was,
Where peace's wish is,
Where peace will never be.

We live in a time,
Where suffering always was,
Where suffering always is,
Where suffering will always be.

We live in a time,
Where we wish that what was,
Where we wish for what is,
Where we wish for what will be.

We live in a time,
Where the difference was,
Where the difference is,
AND where the difference will be.

(written December 1st, 2008)

Today's Leaders

Sitting upon your throne,
You're being informed that,
People are complaining.
You're not sure what about.

You hear the words being said,
You see the people run in and out.
You're hearing loud sounds,
You're seeing things unconventional.

People start running around,
Frantically bashing into each other,
Causing more chaos then before.
You sit there rubbing your chin.

Watching the myriad of fuss,
You wonder what it is that you,
Should be doing as the leader.
Of the town, city, country.

It finally comes to you,
That there might be a way,
To fix the entirety of the problem,
All you have to do is get up.

You stand looking out the window,
Focus on the main problem at hand.
You come to a conclusion,
Now that you have, you sit back down.

(written May 23rd, 2009)

A Sad Change

In the rise of power,
Comes the fall of order.
It's every man for himself,
In a competitive world.

Common sense becomes uncommon,
Priorities become mixed and lost.
Identities become confused,
Morality is no longer a concern.

Through the days we strive,
Working hard to succeed.
But what happens to everything,
If we should one day fall?

Lose ourselves to society?
Becoming mechanical creatures.
Who try to look a certain way,
In image, dress...self portrayals.

I say we take a stand,
Striking out of our comfort zones.
Pushing it to the brinks,
Things that concern us most.

Our morals, our beliefs,
Everything we've ever been taught.
The very things we base,
All of our decissions on.

As hard as it may be,
As challenged as we are.
We should stand and fight,
For we know we need to.

We do not want to have,
All the things exposed infront of us.
Lies, deceit, adultery and,
That lack of self control.

The world today is lost,
Redefined by what we see.
Mimicking all the things deemed cool,
It's saddening to see what we've become.


(written December 8th, 2007)

A New Beginning

As the days of old drift on past,
I somehow knew it would never last.
The pain I felt,
And the anger I dealt.
Soon would have to come to an end.

Watching the sun rise anew,
I have discovered what I must do.
Prepare myself for a brand new day,
And leave the old me where I used to lay.

As I leave my old self behind,
I look forward for a new me to find.
Standing in the light and not the dark,
This new me is bound to make a mark.

Postiive and true, radiant and free,
All the good things in life I now see.
Nothing to hinder this forward motion,
I can now walk and not just make a notion.

So out I set to start fresh all over,
Shunning all the skeletons that may hover.
Around me still, they try to fly,
The new me will watch them all die.
For I have found my new beginning.


(written August 15th, 2007)

Oh Insomniacs

The energy continuously flowing,
Twitching the muscles, moving limbs.
How on earth am I supposed to sleep?
If I can't turn my body and mind off?

Awake I lay, as time just flies by,
The mind racing with thoughts anew.
How am I supposed to disconnect it?
If a new thought is a revelation to me.

After a few very long and tiring hours,
I decide to give up and get out of bed.
What other options do I have, if I can't sleep?
May as well attempt to become tired, again.

Living each day as though it never ended,
Until suddenly you have no choice but to collapse.
How can this be healthy and normal for anyone?
I'm so tired of not being tired only to crash.


(written December 12th, 2007)

The Orange Moo

Brightly coloured,
Full of goodness.
The Orange Moo,
A random thought.

Inspired by colour,
Filled with water.
The Orange Moo,
Loved throughout.

Muchly talked about,
Now has a personality.
The Orange Moo,
Can be seen too!!!

Storewide known,
Travels to and fro.
The Orange Moo,
IS MY WATER BOTTLE!!!


(written September 10th, 2007)

The Madness Inside

There is a small thing I must get,
So tiny and so powerful.
Sent by my Father who tells me,
It will aid agianst our enemy.

I came, though I did not wish to,
Meeting races I knew not.
It is my only goal to get this thing,
And bring it back to my city.

For the first time I have seen this object,
Small, golden and round.
The One Ring, I'm told is what it is called,
Cut from the hand of Sauron.

The perfect weapon to use against our foes,
To protect ourselves in battle.
It would conceal the person who wears it,
Allowing them an advantage.

I'm told though that no-one can wield it,
So what is this feeling inside?
If it is such a completely useless object,
What point is my mission based on?

There's something strange about this ring,
I can hear it calling my name.
I've become completely obsessed with it,
I watch it's bearer carefully.

I know it was made for a great Dark Lord,
But it's my name I hear.
I'm convinced that I should have been it's bearer,
Not that wormy little halfling.

I will find a way to get it from him,
When nobody else is nearby.
I will get what truly belongs to me,
Even if he has die.

There is no stopping this feeling inside,
I know what I must do.
Finally off into the woods alone he went,
Diversion, we need a fire.

I follow him in gathering twigs and branches,
I tell him that it is unsafe to be alone.
Then I suggest that we take the ring to my city,
Where it will be useful to my people.

Our lives will be spared, we can fight off evil,
For once we will be free.
He cares not, he says it's not wisdom I say,
There's a warning in his heart.

Again my attempt turns folly with him,
I suggest being lent the ring.
I can see the fear in his eyes now, and still,
He tries to fight me off.

He becomes invisible, I believe our hopes are gone,
He will take the ring to Sauron.
He will betray us all to the Dark Lord,
Surrendering his life and ours.

Kicked by the air I fall to the ground,
Suddenly I am filled with remorse.
What have I done? Where has he gone?
I frantically call out his name.

I have failed my friends, and my Father.
I have believed a lie.
For now I see that He ws right all along,
No-one can wield it.

What can I do to regain my honour, my pride?
I know, I will defend their lives.
Something dark draws near, I can feel it,
I hear small voices calling out.

It is the little ones, calling to the enemy,
I will go to them at once!
I see orcs completely surrounding them,
This is my chance.

The Horn of Gondor I blow, calling for help,
But more orcs show up instead.
I blow it again, hoping the others will hear,
Again more orcs, where are they?

I've been hit, pierced by a poisoned arrow,
But I keep on fighting.
Hit again and once more after that,
I can hardly breathe now.

This must be the end, a coldness in my blood,
Finally I see my friends arrive.
I tell Him everything, I failed, I tried to take the ring,
In my last moment, I realize, he is MY King.


(written October 24th, 2007)

One Season To The Next

Light brown, dark brown,
Bright orange, red and yellow.
All the tall tales of autumn,
A season that leads to Winter.

Dark and light grey clouds,
Sometimes even white, fluffy.
The snow brings winter,
But rains lead into the Spring.

Bright, light beautiful flowers,
Baby animals, fresh clean air.
Colourful and fragrant, is spring,
But along comes heat, Summer.

Light green turning brown,
Finding shade, from the sun.
The dulling of colours, summer,
Bright oranges again, autumn.

A continuous cycle of seasons,
Ever changing, one after another.
Going from brights, lights and dulls,
The seasons always change.


(written November 13th, 2007)

The Not-So-Roller Coaster Life

Life is known as a roller coaster,
It seems to go up and down.
However, unlike such a machine,
That is not how our lives are run.

We go through the days of life,
Just surviving and making our way.
Doing what is expected of us,
Sometimes, dreading the next day.

Succession isn't just handed to us,
We actually have to earn it's reward.
Failure is one of the things we dread,
However, without it, we'd be bored.

Roller coasters go up and down,
Human life is not as simple as such.
We deal with things from day to day,
That help us, in the end, gain so much.


(written October 5th, 2007)

Moving Backwards

Looking at the whiteness,
You make a note of something.
While everything maybe bright,
Everything is outlined in black.

In the distance you see grey,
The outlines get darker.
You're not sure what you're looking at,
Sadly, though, it's getting blurry.

As you reach the grey atmosphere,
It suddenly dawns on you.
In the distance you see a surprise,
Something else, much like the haze.

There is a darkness ahead,
The outlines have changed to white.
Suddenly you come to a realization,
You only think you're moving forwards.

However, back to the shadows you go.
The white lines still forming blurs,
Nothing is clear, the forwards notion,
Ends up being the backwards motion.

(written May 23rd, 2009)

An Angel Unforeseen?

Can I give you my heart?
Will I be able to share,
All the love that is inside,
That I no longer can bear?

Can I trust you enough?
To keep it safe within,
From falling and breaking,
Like a precious crystal smashing?

Will I be able to let go?
Enough to let you in,
To see what I really have,
Without risking everything?

Are you an unforeseen angel?
We've never met before,
However, my heart has once,
Built up a wall and locked the door.

I hope the answer to all is Yes.
Because I see it in your eyes,
The answer to all of my questions,
That is the future to both our lives.


(written October 27th, 2007. For my dear friend BelovedCaptain.)

Two Sides To Every Story

You see me smiling,
You hear me laughing,
You catch me playing,
I'm having so much fun.

I see me crying,
I hear me screaming,
I catch my violence,
I'm losing myself.

You see brightness in my eyes,
You hear warmth in my words,
You catch the joy I'm spreading,
I'm such a happy-go-lucky person.

I see the pain inside my soul,
I hear sounds that aren't apparent,
I catch myself thinking sad thoughts,
I'm hiding all the hurt deep within.

When I'm having bad days,
You wonder if I'm alright.
When I see you walking by,
I smile, both faint and wide.

There are always two sides,
To every story ever told.
There's the side that you see,
And the side that you don't.


(written August 22nd, 2008)

Realizing Humanity

Please bring me back to reality,
What I see is not what is.
I need your hand to pull me out,
Of my ever dark dwelling.

I reach up to find something,
To hold, but sadly nothing's there.
I hear you wandering around,
Above, muttering to yourself.

I'd like for you to stop for once,
Maybe see if there's an issue, below.
I'm trying to scream for help,
Can't you hear me, even whispering?

I know my screams aren't loud,
Are the noises around you deafening?
I'm sorry for not being memorable,
I wish someone would just wonder.

There's a giant hole, right by your feet,
And down below sits someone in pain.
Mostly from the fall, and from the neglect,
From the choking, the suffocation.

I just want to be brought back,
Out into the world of humanity.
Where people care, love, share,
Show compassion, concern, dependability.

For now though, I must lay here,
On the dirt carpeted floor.
One thing I've been reminded of,
Humanity died long before I fell.

(written May 23rd, 2009)

Soul Storms

Black clouds,
Thunder roaring,
Lightening striking,
Wind blowing,
Rain pelting,
Hiding,
Inside a dark cave,
You cower,
Behind a boulder,
Waiting,
For the storm to pass,
Light grey clouds,
Pattering rain,
Peering from the mouth,
Of the cave.
Sun shining,
Clouds evaporating,
Birds chirping.
Your soul,
Is once more,
At peace.

(written May 23rd, 2009)

Forever and Always

Forever.
I will stand
by your side. Fighting
with you, standing up for you.
Accepting your flaws, revealing my
Love. Showing compassion, even in
My times of need. Allowing you
to find where you feel
You belong. Safe
In my arms.
Always.

(written September 20th, 2007)

A Small Fragile Life

Orange and white,
Small and active.
Four legs, 2 front teeth,
Expressive eyes.

Run, run, run,
All through the night.
Sleep, sleep, sleep,
All through the day.

Skittish around hands,
Hasn't nibbled a finger.
Found a way out,
Explored the surroundings.

Tired, tired, tired,
Now day and night.
Munch, munch, munch,
Food intake decreasing.

Autumn is too cold,
The nights colder still.
Slowly disappearing,
Beneath bedding for warmth.

Squeak, squeak, squeak,
At first sounds like hiccups.
Run, hiccup, run, hiccup,
Out of the running ball.

The hiccups become worst,
Nose turns purple and wet.
Eyes look pinker, squinty,
Like loose slits on a snake.

Chew, chew, chew,
Medicine is not edible.
Gulp, gulp, gulp,
Cold water makes issues worst.

Now the heat is kept on,
To keep things warm.
Both humans leave at night,
The heat goes off.

Cough, cough, cough,
The temperature has dropped.
Swallow, swallow, swallow,
Panicking about lack of oxygen.

I walk into the house,
The very next morning, after work.
I notice something's wrong,
I do nothing right away.

Wash, wash, wash,
Getting ready for bed.
Sleep, sleep, sleep,
Peaceful dreams, aren't mine.

I wait for my roommate,
To leave and go to work.
I hesitate for a few minutes,
Then I clean out the cage.


(written December 15th, 2007)

The Lack of Dance

I wish that I could dance,
To help me with my feelings.
Set me free from my prison,
Help me express myself.

Pent up anger would get out,
In a much more constructive way.
Consuming despair would alter,
Be freeing instead of destructive.

Letting go and dancing in the rain,
Would hide all the tears of pain.
Dancing in the sun filled fields,
Would allow me to feel refreshed.

Sadly though, I'm not a dancer,
I only wish I could be one.
Sadly, I take out my feelings,
In less constructive ways.

(written May 9th, 2009)

Let Me In

You can't understand where I'm coming from,
Cause I've never fully opened up to you.
I don't blame you for being distant from me,
How or why would it be any other way?

You can't trust someone without their trust,
You can't share with someone who holds back.
It's hard to believe someone's words,
When they only share with you, little tidbits.

You wish they'd tell you more,
So that you could help them with their problems.
You wish that they would trust you more,
So you didn't feel like there was nothing you could do.

The truth is, no matter what, they don't.
They don't trust you, they don't believe you.
You want them to, because you love them,
And you just want to help them.

(written May 9th, 2009)

Inside, Outside.

It's painful, even to me.
It's sad to think about.
Even when I'm feeling good,
I do something harmful.

When will I learn?
How long will it take?
Do I seriously believe,
That I'm not worth it?

That there's no help,
I'll never get better,
No matter what happens,
I'll always be unworthy.

Inside, I'm bleeding,
Outside, I'm bruising.
Inside, I'm screaming,
Outside, I'm relaxed.

Can you ever tell,
When something's wrong?
When my issues,
Are eating me alive?

Would you believe me,
If I told you I was fine?
If I had a dark cloud,
That hung over my head?

Inside, I'm in a dark hole,
Outside, I'm radiating.
Inside, my voice echos,
Outside, I'm silent as the grave.

I warn you right now,
Nothing is what it seems.
I literally avoid answering,
The things I feel I deserve.

(written May 9th, 2009)

Never Any Good On My Mind

You sit there,
On my mind.
Why are you there?
When it's been some time.

For so long it's been,
Since I've seen you last.
I still can't stand you though,
There's something you should know.

When people sit there,
LIngering for quite a while.
It means that something's wrong,
Something that could drop a bomb.

It may be nothing at all,
It may be something bad.
I could never tell you what it is,
But I'm officially worried about this.

Nothing good ever comes,
Of sitting on my mind.
The thought that never flies,
Is knowing that everyone dies.

(written May 9th, 2009)

The Candle's Light

Smoking.
Burning bright,
Alighting the darkness.
Reaching into the depths,
Of all who seem lost and without.
The glimmer of any light, being
Awaited. So small it may be,
But great hope it brings.
Until one day, when,
The candle's light,
Goes out.


(written November 28th, 2007)

An Urgency Holdback

Standing in the shadows,
I listen.
For any kind of sound,
A signal.

I quietly creep to the corner,
To see.
Once I see a tall form,
I withdraw.

Danger is so close to me now,
It's unsafe.
What else is there to do?
But hide.

Suddenly, the voices stop,
Uh-oh.
Footsteps are drawing near,
Crouch down.

Amazingly I never noticed,
This rock.
Perfect for my protection,
From them.

Amongst all of their uncertainty,
They leave.
I get up and make a run for it,
For safety.

Whatever happened to them,
Who knows?
But the road for me must go on,
Breathe, continue.



(written December 26th, 2007)

A Little Discovery

Shift your eyes towards the doors,
My shelter is a thought case.
Overwhelming me with dangers,
Mostly feelings of being blackballed.

I couldn't scream loud enough,
Even if the lies couldn't hurt me.
My voice box has been closed,
All I can do now is watch and wait.

For what though, I'm not sure.
Perhaps for a chance at freedom,
An opportunity to grasp onto something,
Real, strong and unconditional.

As I keep my eyes focused,
On the world outside my box.
There is one thing that I learn,
I may be more self centered then I thought.

(written January 17th, 2009)

Where Hopes Fail(Part 1)

Long have I waited patiently,
To hear the words never said.
To feel the withheld emotions,
I so badly wish he actually felt.

Yet again, he points out to me,
That I am nothing but a failure.
I have done nothing right for him,
I have only lost him everything.

My brother able to win him a city,
My brother able to fight the enemy.
My brother sent out on a mission,
My brother trusted to the death.

He talks only of his achievments,
His wins, loyalties, trustworthyness.
I am nothing compared to my brother,
According to him, I am worthless.

So what reason do I have to stay,
To fight, to try and prove myself.
For him, I have no purpose here,
Only lose him all the things he's lost.

So, here I ride out to meet my fate,
The peoples of this city, lined to the gate.
Watching and crying as I exit with my men,
Knowing that this could be my end.

As the gates open wide I leave,
Knowing there is no turning back.
If not my Father then maybe my mother,
And my brother, I could make proud.

I lead my men out into the fields,
a long line we form across them.
This could be the end of all of us,
But now none of us can be rejected.

Rejected by the thought that we were cowards,
Rejected by the thought that we didn't care.
Rejected by the fact that numbers do matter,
Rejected because we only want to protect ourselves.

Finally we will no longer be accused,
Of being fearful against our enemies.
We will now be able to show proof,
That there were, of them, too many.

Our spears up, our voices turning into shouts,
We can see our enemies riding to meet us.
They too hold up their weapons and voices,
They ride hard, fast and right into us.


(written August 18th, 2007 for my dear BelovedCaptain)

Love Is The Future(Part 2)

The pain of the enemy's arrow,
Pierced through my flesh.
Spreading it's poison throughout,
Leaving me motionless.

As I lay I can hear loud shouts,
One is that of my father.
The other is a rather small voice,
Loud, shrill and high pitched.

I can almost hear my father's words,
He's shouting insanities.
But this smaller voice, shouts truth,
I'm not dead, I need medicine.

After countless hours of suffering,
I feel as though I'm floating.
I know I'm being carried somewhere,
But where I do not know.

After a few minutes of marching along,
I stop floating, I am moved.
I have been placed onto something,
It's a cold and hard place.

I can hear what seems to be echoing,
We must be underground.
I can hear the piling of wood branches,
I feel a liquid pour over me.

Where have I been so secretly taken,
Am I not in the House of Healings?
Is there no medicine that can help me?
What is that liquid on me?

I hear a loud bang come from somewhere,
And it sounds like a horse.
Suddenly, as though a fire has been lit,
I'm surrounded by sudden heat.

What is going on now? I'm being pushed,
I can feel myself falling down.
I know I've hit the bottom, I've stopped,
I can feel little hands on me.

It seems as though they're patting me,
But why, I don't know.
I smell something that resembles smoke,
My senses are coming back.

I try to look around as my eyes adjust,
For now I can open them.
I am lying on the floor of a cement room,
The Stewards Death Chamber.

I see my father upon the stone podium,
I must have been there.
I see him amongst the flames around him,
The heat I felt, was fire.

I now understand what has happened,
My father despaired.
He thought there was nothing left,
I thought I lost him everything.

I see Gandalf and the pair of small hands,
I've met him once before.
He was in my father's hall while I was,
He was serving him.

As my senses come back into focus,
I attempt to hold myself up.
With the help of my new found heroes,
I make my way to medicine.

As I lay in the House of Healings,
I see a woman come in.
She is taken to a seperate room,
She is being followed.

As time passes I see her again,
This time in the gardens.
She is beautiful and fair to look upon,
I realize, there is hope.

Hope for a future I never thought of,
A possibility for love.
Hope for acceptance in a place that,
I never thought to look.

Here is now where my new future is,
I just know it's her.
I can feel it growing inside my heart,
I have found my place.


(written October 21st, 2007, also for my friend BelovedCaptain)

Winter Blues

Wishing for snow,
Hoping to see white.
A winter wonderland,
Long forgotten.

So many years,
Without much coldness.
Left with a draft,
A slight wind chill.

Oh how I dream,
Of the falling white softness.
That lands so gently,
Upon the ground.

So long has the winters,
Been so full of rain.
Nothing to make angels in,
Or make snowmen with.

I have officially been,
Filled with the winter blues.
For rain falls down,
Where the snow should.


(written December 6th, 2007)

The Opened Door

I can see inside another person's mind,
Where someone else seeks something to find.
Though what it is, to me is unknown,
Unfortunately though, my curiosity has grown.

Through a window an older man catches,
Lights on upstairs in the abandoned mansion.
An odd feeling rising as he draws near,
Strange voices inside, bringing him fear.

He stands outside the door just to have a listen,
When suddenly something in the light glistens.
It slithers on past and into the room,
Without a word, it announces his doom.

A man in a chair turned quickly into sight,
Without one word a flash of bright green light.
Suddenly thrown out of the other's eye,
Sadly to say, I saw another man die.


(written August 15th, 2007. Under the title What Does This Mean?)

Solid Friend

You never talk back,
You hear my every word.
You keep all my secrets,
You always shelter me.

You break my falls,
You never fall down,
You keep me safe,
You actually know me.

You do not judge,
You do not hold grudges,
You do not accuse,
You do not hurt others.

I can lean upon you,
I can always trust you,
I can feel safe near you,
I can confide in you.

You're solid as a rock,
You're solid as stone.
You never give up,
You never go away.

No matter where I am,
There you are, nearby.
I am surrounded by you,
Everywhere I go, in some form.

You are my solid friend.

(written October 22nd, 2008)